Legal Quandary

Friday, May 20, 2005

Friday Spies

From the imagination of the folks from BTQ, today’s Friday Spies – the Would you Rather? edition. Of course, since I’ve been at work all day and have now read just about everyone else’s posts on this, I’m not sure there’s much in here that you haven’t read elsewhere. Fair warning.

Would I rather:

1. Live alone on a deserted island for 10 years or be paid to live at Neverland Ranch with the King of Pop for one year?

Honestly, I could go either way on this one. I tend to be something of a hermit by nature, and think I could be pretty happy living on my own for an extended period of time. However, I would be pretty bummed about missing seeing my kids grow up, so I have to go with living at Neverland Ranch. Without my kids. As a fully grown adult, I don’t anticipate being in any sort of danger. Santa Maria is a beautiful place (though I’m pretty sure he’s much closer to Los Olivos), and it’s in the middle of good wine country. I think I could handle it, and I’m fairly confident the accommodations would be more than adequate.

2. Be deaf or blind?

Well, there’s a good chance that I will actually wind up either deaf or pretty darned close to it at some point. Both of my grandmothers are quite hard of hearing (though how much of that is selective is a matter of debate.) If I were smart, I would take classes with my kids now so that we can all understand each other later.

I would really hate to be blind. When I was in the 6th grade, we did a class experiment where one student (me) had to pretend to be blind all day. I wore a bandana over my eyes, had to be led from class to class, and couldn’t participate in certain [most] activities. While many of these things could obviously be overcome given time to learn coping skills, the experience, uh, opened my eyes to how much I rely on my sight. Also, I have zero confidence in my ability to learn Braille.

3. Have skin which changed color depending on your mood or visible sight lines?

I pick Moody skin. People don’t generally have a hard time telling what kind of mood I’m in anyway. I smile when I’m happy and become verbally abusive when I’m mad. BUT I am also a people watcher and something of a peeping Tom (Well! If people are gonna leave their blinds open, I’m gonna look! Don’t judge me!)

4. Spend a year in prison or a year on tour with Celine Dion and John Tesh?

This question really isn’t that much different from Question #1, is it? I mean, other than the length of time factor. I’m going to have to opt for comfort and freedom, and go on tour. A prison sentence might be tough to explain to future employers. Heck – the tour might even be fun. I’ve seen Oprah – Celine Dion has awesome food catered every night. There are worse things in life than hanging out with rich people who happen to have horrible taste. While there would likely be much eye rolling over the quality of music, I could probably write a kick-ass book at the end of the experience. “LQ Expose: My Year Away (from Sanity)”

5. Have threesome with your close friends or with total strangers?

Ummm…this is a family blog. Considering that 1) some of my family read this blog, and 2) my children may read this at some point, I’m going to have to say that Mr. Q. is the only one I think about having sex with. And Lil Q, if you ever read this – it was just that once, since I know the idea of your parents having sex would just freak you out.