Legal Quandary

Saturday, April 01, 2006

Dear Checkout Lady,

I come to your store more or less for only one reason: to buy something piddly with my debit card and get cash back because I am too cheap to pay ATM fees, even though my bank refunds them.

So when you put up a little sign about "no cash back" on your checkout aisle after I've waited in line for 15 minutes because you are - I swear to God - the slowest checkout lady on Earth, I'm gonna challenge you on it. If you had given me a good reason like, say, a mechanical glitch, I probably would have let it slide. BUT if you tell me that you do that because other people have gotten way too much cash back and wiped out all the bills in your drawer…well, do you see how that's not my problem? And how there are less drastic means of achieving the same goal? Like setting reasonable limits on how much cash you can get back - you know, the way MOST places do it???

The thing is, you made it more or less clear to me that this was your OWN little policy and not that of the store, so if you're going to play the bitch, well…I'll see your bitch and raise you. And don't say you didn't have fair warning - I was wearing my TVPNU Law t-shirt.

When it comes between getting some uppity checkout clerk in trouble or going home and writing a paper, I think we all know that paper's not getting written.

Just doing my part to give lawyers and law students a bad name.

Hugs & Kisses


I try to be good. I try to leave the law student thing in the bag and try to work things out normal-citizen-to-normal-citizen. So anyone who manages to behave poorly enough to induce me to haul it out completely deserves everything they get.
Sometimes law students (and especially lawyers) pull out the "Law" card at stupid moments. I once had a lady who thought the copay on her prescription was too high say to me: "I'm a lawyer and I do not have to pay these ridiculous copays!" What the hell does being a lawyer have to do with getting shitty insurance? I bit back my initial reply which was "Save it for the judge" and told her that MY copay (as a pharmacist) was actually higher for that particular prescription and if she had any questions about her copay she should talk to the benefits coordinator where she works. She bitched and yelled all the way out the door. I doubt she was even a lawyer! Even you guys are not that annoying. :)
To be fair, I didn't pull out the law card (aka the "jackass card") right there, but I did question her rather pointedly as to the policy its rationale. And then I went to the store manager to clarify as to whether that was actual store policy or just something she'd made up. The manager assured me it was something totally made up. I don't condone yelling at people publicly (it tends to make me look stupid), but I don't think it's wrong to point out to management that people in customer service positions are behaving in a way that suggests that customers are an inconvenience.

Also, I do actually go there for more than just rinky dink stuff - just not every time I'm there. You just have to trust me that the whole getting cash thing makes sense in my world.
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