Legal Quandary

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

I Come From Unclean People

Someone told me a couple of years ago that research proved that she "was genetically disposed toward inactivity." I didn't say anything at the time, but later joked that I hadn't read that scientists had discovered the gene for laziness. Maybe there's more to that theory than I gave her credit for.

My family must be woefully lacking in the gene for cleanliness.

I arrived Monday morning on the red eye. [sidenote - it's amazing the things people will discuss in airports with perfect strangers. I learned wayyyy more than I ever wanted to know about several of my fellow travelers.] I'm staying with one of Mr. Q's aunts. They had to go to work, but left the door unlocked for me! Chances of me doing that where I live ~ 0.0%.

The house was freakishly clean. No dishes left in the sink. Nothing on the counter. All the beds were made (doors were open - it wasn't like I was snooping). Amazing. My house is never that clean - even after I've cleaned, you can bet there's one room or closet where all the papers and stuff has just been piled up "to be sorted out later." [read: when we move]

I took a nap, and then headed out to shop and go to dinner with B. I met him at his house, where he gave me the nickel tour. Also, freakishly clean. Even the garage was immaculate. It's a good thing he didn't marry me - my (lack of) housekeeping skills would have driven him nuts. On the plus side, we had a nice dinner, and we might get together again Thursday with his parents for Greek food. The benefit of being an ex-girlfriend and not an ex-wife is that his parents still like me. Though I fully intend to go visit my ex-mother-in-law this week too (and she still likes me too), so maybe that's not such a hard and fast rule.

This morning I arrived at my dad's. Only freakishly clean if by "freakishly", you mean absolutely filthy. We have movers coming to do the weight estimate tomorrow, and I still have to finish scrubbing the kitchen. I spent 4 hours today cleaning half of the kitchen and it's a small kitchen. When you have to start using Easy-Off as a general purpose cleaner, that's a clue you've got a problem. And I'm sure I'll end up with some sort of degenerative respiratory ailments as a result of breathing in all the fumes.

I finally had to stop because I was sweating into my rubber gloves and my fingers started to wrinkle up and hurt.

Foibles of the day.

Number of plastic tv dinner containers neatly stacked, but not washed, in the cabinet - 34
Number of kitchen cabinets - 7. Number of cabinets that had at least one (most had 6-7) twist tie wrapped around the handle - 7. Number of fruit stickers (the annoying kind they stick on the fruit) stuck on said cabinets - 13.
Oldest perishable item found to date. An unopened bottle of grapefruit juice purchased on the 6th of February 2000.

All of that somehow makes me feel better about my Spring Cleaning tomorrow. Not sure if it's because I know now I really need to do it, or because it's not as bad as your dad's place.
There's no possible way it could be as bad. None.
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